the

Redneck Riviera Tour

then put the famine jamming you don't

get no fire first stop on the tour

Bama jam so much to see so much organic

food yes

boiled peanuts dee-licious Stuckey went

on a photoshoot

Aldean and George Strait hooked me up

with a nice photo shoot and then it was

bull riding time I stayed on for six

seconds being from Vermont that's pretty

good Stuckey Alabama native two seconds

yeah we don't have Bulls in Alabama

after that what can you do but go get

yourself a personalized airbrushed

t-shirt that's mark hot air by mark mark

a painted pubes on a woman's vagina ask

him about it so far O'Shea hooked us up

with badass hats and what's more badass

and running a ferris wheel our friend

Adam hood also did a set that day check

him out online and after Adam shows

spoonful James when Quinn Patrick and

Eric and then it was time for the main

event

miss damages how are we found an

original here we are with the reigning

Miss Bama Jam what's your name Jamie

where are you from Bama Jam BAM what do

you think it takes to win miss Bama Jam

that's confidence right there look at

that poise she's a champion and then it

was time to take the jägermeister stage

thanks to Trey and Britney we played all

three days of Bama jam but we never

played this song once

the defibrillators followed us Mary took

artsy photos of the band and fell in

love with each of them individually

especially metal belly then I spent my

last $10 on a three foot rain stick then

we went over to here Smitty and critter

doing a little fiddle duel the night

descended oh the Vixens and the Bama

slam saloon Kenny Chesney took the stage

we missed that rocked our world Marty

Stewart and then we started drinking

just a little bit but not as much as

this guy which guy over there there he

is that guy that a cigar burn I don't

know what he's he's in trouble and that

was it we called it a night we got our

friends to give us some Bama jams I'll

take one Bama jam take one damage in

Bama Jam every day yeah and I don't want

to wear my pajamas REM drew

then it was off to Atlanta where we

promptly got screwed out of money then

we rushed on down to Savannah where

Murray turned into a riverboat gambler I

do declare our dogs on four then we

penny surfed our way on up to Athens GA

that's our waitress she was hot and then

we met up in Nashville with our good

friend Reggie Watts yeah we did a quick

interview in the car via speakerphone on

the way to Birmingham at work play you

see these things they're worms this guy

ate him his name's Josh good job Josh we

gave him a free CD he earned it this guy

ran for Alabama AG commish I'm Dale

Peterson so listen up illegals bussed in

by the thousands and they don't give a

rip about Alabama and why one of my

opponents doing about stealing yard

signs in the dark of night

Dale's ad inspired Stuckey so we pulled

over the side of i-65 and he helped out

with the campaign

then we made our way to Perdido Key to

the flora bama

but Murray began by taking some artsy

photos see that's the floor Bama then he

also won a lobster that's right four

bucks the lobster claw look how happy I

am you catch it they cook it now usually

during the defib set this is where

roadblock takes a shot of whiskey

instead I got him half a glass of

whiskey if you watch closely Ginsberg in

the back is about to swat at it here we

go yeah

we hired new management that's our agent

that's our team of lawyers

that's our publicist we had a nightcap

with mr. fody and put him in a cab back

to New York City next morning oil on the

beach a little Grand Marnier cuz our

throats are sore and our dicks were hard

sweating stuff you've turned into a 50s

dad and then into a cowboy well we

closed down the tour the only way we

knew how at 4:00 a.m. and the Waffle

House with Gandalf and I saved the seat

for my best friend me Dale Peterson what

is this [ __ ] I don't know did you do it

put it there just there and why